On Saturday afternoon Christmas was officially cancelled. I’ve sat on writing this because I feel so sad and angry about everything. Which doesn’t help anyone really. Plus I know I’m not the only person affected by this – the whole country is a shit show (the world, really) and I’m luckier than a lot of people. I just felt this weekend for a second that I can’t do this anymore.

Remember when we hit the six months milestone of this pandemic? Chelsea Peretti had my back for that one. Then Dr Aisha Ahmad has this to say. Where’s our soon to be ten month motivation? I really need it right now.

Okay, maybe it isn’t completely cancelled but Christmas as many of us know it is fucked – and the plans I so happily laid down a few days ago might be shot to shit. We’re still trying to work out what we can and can’t get away with under the government restrictions. Hopefully Mum can still come.

Everybody I know is anxious and disappointed, worrying about a new super-strain of the virus (prolific in the South East, yay) and many are spending Christmas alone now. A new Tier has been introduced and Boris & Co have whipped away any hope of having a festive season to make up for such an awful year. Which isn’t the most important thing in the whole world I know but you get my drift.

I understand why they’ve done it and even agree with it – five days off socialising like we’re in Caligula and expecting no consequences was never going to work but the promise of it to then be taken away is really hard to swallow.

That’s it then. Cancel the kitchen scraps for lepers and orphans, no more merciful beheadings, and call off Christmas. ~ The Sheriff of Nottingham, Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves

This is a very woe is me post which I don’t really like writing but I’m doing this feeling my true feelings thing. I’m worried about my mum, who’s in Tier 4 and in a horribly infected area – I want her to come and stay with us tbh until this all blows over.

I want to go to sleep and wake up in the Spring when everything is fixed (God I hope it’s at least most of the way there by then). But of course, we’ll all just keep going the best we can because what other option is there?

We’ve come this far together and maybe there aren’t that many more steps to go – or maybe it’s miles – but we have to keep waddling along. One day at a time, one step, one breath.

I’m eating my body weight in Christmas junk whatever happens.

How’s everyone else? I hope you’re okay ā¤ļø